Kelly (not her real name) contacted me about money issues, but said right away that it was not really about money – it was about limiting messages she had received from her mother, whose energy had been blocking her professional and financial success for a long time. Kelly: “I am not good enough, I don’t deserve money and success, I don’t amount to anything – those are the messages I got from my mother. And she was right. But I know that I can be successful, it’s my turn. She is blocking me.”

Her anger was at an intensity level of 10 – her stomach and upper body very tight, so we started with tapping on that and continued with more negative comments that were coming up (i.e. “Why can’t you be like your brother? You are sick in the head if you think you can do that!”).

Then I introduced Inner Theater to her. I asked her to envision her professional goal (she has a very clear goal indeed) as a pot of gold, or a rainbow in the distance, and then tell me what kind of blockage might be showing up between her and her goal.

She said right away that there was this beautiful rainbow in the distance, but her mother was standing there in a field, very stern and demanding. Her mother said, “You are not going there! Who do you think you are? You are nothing!”

Kelly’s anger rose to a 10 again, and a sense of desperation came up: “She did not want me, I was the last child”. More tapping.

When I asked her to look again, Kelly said that the mother was concerned that her daughter was about to go past her: “She doesn’t like it, she is afraid that I am going to leave her in the dust.”

After another round of tapping, the anger and tightness in her stomach dropped appreciably. Taking another look, Kelly said: “She is stepping aside. I am going past her! She says: ‘I can’t believe that you are doing this, how could you.’”

Since Kelly was still a bit afraid that the mother would grab her, we tapped on that fear.

And then came the big shift: “I am halfway to the rainbow, and she is way back. WOW!”

Three weeks later, I received an e-mail from Kelly:

“The session helped me A LOT! More than anything else I have tried and in hardly any time. I feel so much better. I still have a ways to go but I’m getting there. I have kept the visual and have gone way past my mother.”

Carna Zacharias-Miller
Certified EFT practitioner
www.missingmother.com
www.magicaleft.com

I have found myself doing more and more guided imagery along with EFT in so many varied and wonderful ways. I also have been combining art therapy with it with very good results.

I had been seeing Rose for a few months. When she walked in the door I could see that she looked more sad than usual. She reported that her life wasn’t going well . . . she said she just felt stuck and didn’t know why or what to do. She talked about her “stuckness” on many levels: emotional, financial and in her love relationships.

I decided to have her start by closing her eyes and visualizing what the stuck place looked like. She talked as she visualized it: It was a big cement block . . . It was a huge square . . .A grayish color . . . It was solid and unmoving.

We talked about it for a bit and then I had her draw a picture of it. . I cautioned her not to think too much . . . just to draw. As she drew in the artist’s notebook I keep in my office, I noticed her hand sweeping the page. Her stuck place took up the whole paper it was a huge square and she colored it black and gray.

Then I had her visualize what the block was up made of . . . she started to describe it . . . she could see parts of her childhood (especially her father) and her ex husband.

Then I asked her draw what she saw inside of her block… She sectioned off the block and began to write inside of it, “my ex husband”, “my father” . . . . (Note: I had been working with her for weeks in therapy . . . she always said her childhood was perfect. She denied any baggage from her parents!) I asked her what they were saying that stuck in her block and she basically said that they both were saying that she better be perfect or else. . .the perfect daughter, the perfect wife. She realized for the first time that her ex and her dad had very similar qualities! They criticized her . . . she had to be pretty all the time, if she didn’t look good . . . she was no good . . . she was the trophy daughter and had become the trophy wife.

Then we tapped:

Even though my father and my ex husband thought I was only okay when I looked good and was totally a “good girl”, I completely and totally love and accept myself.

Even though I built this false self because I was afraid my dad wouldn’t like me if I wasn’t perfect in all areas I am ready to recognize all the inner beauty and wonder inside of me and I completely love and accept myself.

Even though I felt I had to act like they wanted me to act, I know better now and I am willing to see myself differently.

We did the reminder phrases with variations of:

Of course, I am stuck . . . I never knew who I was beyond a pretty face.

Just a pretty face to them.–a perfect little Barbie doll.

That is all that mattered to them. So I thought that was all I had to offer.

They never saw the real me. It was there. I am beginning to be in touch with the real me. I have so much to offer.

Then I had her visualize what she was going to do with the cement block . . . She buried it way out somewhere in a deep woods. Next, I asked her to visualize someone in her life, whether it be her own guardian angel or someone who loves her or her wisest self, tell her all the ways she shines. She came up with, “Funny, smart, responsible, loving, artistic, compassionate, trust-worthy, loyal, etc.”

We tapped as she said those things to herself and I made her a CD with all those positive statements about herself on them. We also tapped on forgiveness of herself and her ex and dad keeping in mind that everyone was doing what they thought was best for her . . . if they knew better they would have done better but now she knows better.

Her whole face looked open and alive. When she left she said, “Thank you Brenda! I feel so free! This was worth 5 years of Freudian Therapy!”

She continues to do well as she is remembering who she really is. What an honor it is to do this work!

Robin (not her real name) had been with her physically abusive husband for many years. They are divorced now, but Robin is tortured by the intense need to go back to him. He seems to be a changed man now, and she could finally have the marriage of her dreams… Since she is a smart, educated woman, she knows that this is an illusion, and she hates herself for this “disgusting” longing.

We had done several traditional EFT sessions on this issue, and it all helped somewhat. However, it was Inner Theater work that lead to the breakthrough.

This time, I asked her for an image for this longing, “disgusting” part of her that wanted her former abuser back.

She immediately came up with a strong visual: A vomiting, sick, ugly woman with leprosy. She tried to hide her boils and scabs, but “the secret was out”. Other people did not want to be close to her. Nobody could help her anyway. We named this woman “Damaged Mary”. Then we started tapping.

“I don’t want anything to do with this; I got to get away from her. If I hang out with her, I soak it up, and I get sick, too. I don’t know how to help her anyway, and I feel completely helpless.”

I reminded Robin that leprosy is actually not a highly contagious disease, and that made her feel better instantly. But she still felt helpless and didn’t know what to do to release this woman’s suffering.

So I stepped in and made an offer: Could you imagine somebody coming into this scene who has the knowledge and the power to help Damaged Mary?

Robin liked the idea, and she brought in a Native American Spirit Guide. He started to pound his staff on the ground, and the upcoming sparks touched all of the sick parts of Mary’s body, making the boils and scabs go away, healing her.

After that, Mary was no longer damaged and looked so much better; she just had some scars on her arms. I suggested that scars were o.k., since nobody goes through life without scars. Robin agreed and hugged Mary. The Spirit Guide now danced around both of them, and then Robin took Mary’s hand and told her that she wanted to buy her dinner.

What an experience! We tapped on some residual feelings until the whole issue dropped to a 0. Robin was feeling great after the session. And this is what she e-mailed me several days later:

“This week’s session was outstanding. I have had a couple of thoughts about getting back with him, kind of out of habit, then I remind myself of what I have studied with you and let it go.”

Carna Zacharias-Miller, EFT-Cert
www.magicaleft.com
www.missingmother.com

Listen below for a preview of Carna’s “Magical EFT”: